New Year's Eve in the suburbs

Okay, we don't really live in the suburbs, just a residential area, kind of on the outskirts of town. We've got lots of stores and banks and public transportation. But, that's about it.

Meanwhile, we were sick on Christmas...then New Year's Eve rolled around, and we were STILL sick and STILL didn't want to pass it on to the grandparents. And hadn't gotten to the store to buy groceries, let alone presents.

Some good friends of ours (Russian) just emigrated to Canada. Like, in November-just over a month ago. I've been keeping up with their teenage daughter on social media, and she wrote this heartbreaking post about not being able to find the holiday spirit. Now...this was after Christmas. So, most people had done their celebrating already, in North America. But when I read that, I realized that she was sitting there, still waiting for the holiday like we Americans wait for Christmas. In Russia, that holiday is New Year's Eve. And if you've ever been in Russia for New Year's Eve, you know that American New Year's celebrations are pretty lame low-key. AND these friends are out there in rural Canada, where everyone is likely hibernating until school starts up again (probably this week, whereas Russian schools are off until January 9th). And she's still waiting for the holiday magic.

I know I wrote a post recently comparing Thanksgiving to Russian New Year's, because it has that overall non-religious/political open table warm fuzzy feeling. But, the holiday magic, and the tree, and decorations, and gift exchange-those, of course, belong to American Christmas/Russian New Year's.

By the way, I'm looking out the window right now late at night, and the Lakhta Tower (you can read about it) is lit up like a Christmas New Year's tree: Green with little glowing yellow lights.

One of our local shopping malls has a big open foyer where there is usually a fun holiday display. A few days before Christmas, I dragged the kids there, even though we were all sick, to see the holiday decorations. Silly me, it was almost Christmas but still more than a week until New Year's, so the holiday decorations were under construction. We got our gingerbread ingredients and I pretty much died carrying it all home.

Motels and milestones

I couldn't really blog for a few weeks because I was spending my evenings (which start at 11 pm) looking for lodging for a 25-person family reunion in New England next summer. I like the challenge of a little online research. But it's actually hard looking for accommodations for such a large group. I even polled FB but no one had any specific suggestions. I found lots and lots of nice vacation rentals that seemed to cap out at about 20 people. Many houses had 6-8 bedrooms, but with 7 adult siblings plus parents (and all the men in my family are tall) plus spouses and kids, a queen bedroom for each family unit was not exactly sounding like a situation that would lead to peace and harmony.

Also, it turns out that October is not too early to book summer accommodations. Some places seemed to be still updating their rates, but lots were booked either from earlybirds or returning customers. And since I had to run ideas by everyone else, it wasn't possible to really jump on those properties that seemed to be filling up fast.

We seem to have found a solution, but I wonder what would make it easier for the next time. Do I really think I know what would work for everyone, or am I only thinking about my own preferences? Do we HAVE to be near the beach? The map was dotted with tons of choices "off the beaten path." But what is a summer vacation without the sea? And what would we all do on a country estate for a week? Or in a ski lodge? Everyone says "we just rent a big house and all pick rooms when we get there." Yeah, but HOW? But even if I had the perfect formula, each kid/adult will be a year older the next time and it will all change. Anyway, we're hoping my dad will be well enough to make the drive and join us for the week-long getaway.

Best-laid plans of 2018

Only ran around for 40 minutes with this blank page open while I restarted the router and fought with the VPN to get David watching BeatBugs so I could do some blogging! That is just to say that plans must always be rather flexible.

Welcome, New Year!

In 2018 I decided to have a focus area for each month. People talk about having a year of saying "yes" or "no" and mine could be described as a year of making myself wait until it's time for that focus area, so that I can give attention to just 1 or 2 goals at a time.

Some of the focus areas are more abstract and some are projects that will get completed.

My focus area for January 2018 is sleep. 

I know it sounds better to start off with a new Bible reading plan or something, but I am desperate to have more energy to do things again and I am just trusting that it will happen in time.

In the past I have tried many times to go to bed earlier and at this point I will be setting an alarm clock to work on the morning end of things as well. I don't sleep well, but my kids get up late enough that getting up with an alarm clock won't hurt.

We don't have a newborn or early morning commitments, so it's a good time to try to tweak our sleep schedule when we're not completely sleep-deprived, just not quite getting enough.


A few notes so far as of January 4th:

Halfway there

Yesterday we were halfway through Advent! And we're nearing the shortest day of the year, which is always a bit of a relief once we're past it.

I've been encouraged by how we've been able to observe Advent this year. David (almost 5 1/2) is able to participate more and take initiative, and his enthusiasm somehow soothes the usual loneliness and dreariness this time of year.

Part of why I didn't write this post earlier is that I wanted to include a few visuals. You may recognize some of our same old decorations from other years, but there are always some changes.

I enjoyed Callie's post about enjoying Christmas as an adult, and I have to say that many of the same principles apply for me, so here is our version.

-Starting early:

Going to all that work to get out/sort decorations (if they're mingled like ours) and arrange them, only to enjoy it for a few weeks? Nope, we have to be able to enjoy them for at least a month, in my mind! I also realized that Christmas decorations and "hygge" go hand in hand, and the lights and candles help bring some comfort in the winter darkness. So...the earlier, the better! This year I got everything out right away heading into the first weekend of Advent. It's not a strict tradition or organizational thing, but rather a way to survive and thrive.

Not Christmas morning yet, but tea parties are underway.

A tale of two fathers

Andrei and I both grew up with great dads! There's a reason I'm focusing on them in this post, but of course the moms are pretty awesome, too.

Back when Andrei and I were "just friends" and left comments on each other's blogs...back when we were in a small group together and prayed for each other's prayer needs...it was almost 10 years ago, and at that time, each of our fathers got diagnosed with prostate cancer.

So there we were, with our fathers going through identical health crises!

But we got through that time. A few years later we got married, and then had kids, and have been going back and forth between the grandparents and making lots of memories.

However, the grandfathers aren't able to visit each other's countries due to their health restrictions. And lately, they've been in sync again with some more serious complications. Over the past few weeks we've been imagining scenarios where we lose Andrei's dad or mine. We could have lost Vladimir when he had a heart attack recently, and we could lose my dad if he doesn't improve soon.

Just yesterday Vladimir was transferred to a "sanatorium" (look up Russian sanatoriums if you're interested!), and tomorrow my dad will be transferred home to receive visiting nurse care.

So it's been a roller-coaster, to say the least! And our family was hit with an INTENSE cold virus a week ago so we haven't been able to offer much support.

Anyway, I don't have anything very profound to say and don't know how to edit this to make it less blunt. Just a little update and of course some things to pray about.

New normal

Anyone else on an academic schedule? I always look forward to the routine that September brings. Andrei's new job this semester has a pretty heavy workload, but at least we know what to expect each day. I have to plan for things like cooking dinner each day since I don't have anyone to go to the store for me and no childcare while I'm doing kitchen stuff. Sometimes it's easier to get done if I'm not counting on someone's help. Of course my MIL is there to help out sometimes though.

One thing about this season (in life and otherwise) is that I don't really get a big chunk of time in the evening. It's basically eat dinner, put kids to bed, put myself to bed (including minimal kitchen clean-up and before-bed routine). Unfortunately, going to bed earlier isn't really resulting in much more sleep. I remember David started sleeping really well starting from about age 3, but I'm not sure if I'm ready for 2 more years of this....(such a sweet age though, all things considered).

Awake at midnight...

The good news is I have a new undamaged laptop and fairly reliable Internet (no thanks to Windows 10 though), and I set it up in the hallway. So I can steal a moment here and there to check up on things online and even jot down a few thoughts or two.

"Command Central," a non-Pinterest version...

This is the time of year when I have to do a lot of Immigration stuff. In fact, I might be involved with it for the next 6 months. :/ There are so many fun fall projects and friend activities and things I would rather be spending time on, but it's hard to enjoy life with all of the paperwork hanging over me!

Birthdays as an adult

Not going to write about a party or growing older...just some rambling about everyday life mingled with birthday stuff.

So my birthday was a few days ago and I set expectations low...no offense to anyone who helped make it special, which I appreciated. ;)

I had the usual birthday insomnia. Does anyone else have that? Again not even really related to deep thoughts about growing older....just general wakefulness and trying to plan out the next day.

Finally was trying to fall asleep around 2:30 a.m., when Sophia joined me for the night. After several wake-ups, I started getting birthday texts around 8 am (on a Sunday morning). However, they were not texts from actual people. They were from stores wanting to "congratulate" me...and inviting me to buy something, of course.

Around 9 Sophia was up for the day, so I headed into another room to play, but Andrei sent me back to bed. After tossing and turning, I was just drifting back to sleep when a friend called. I lied and pretended I hadn't been sleeping. We talked for 5-10 minutes and I really tried to be conversational. But I couldn't help thinking my cup was empty...my people energy, that is.

Andrei made me breakfast, and Sophia was napping by that time since she'd been up for a few hours. Then he went to finish sermon prep and David and I started to make a cake...but Sophia woke up. Like I said, I had low expectations...I looked at the bowl with the butter sitting in it all alone since I hadn't mixed anything together yet. It wasn't too late to run and get dessert from the store. But Andrei took Sophia and encouraged me to go ahead with it.

Remembering

While gathering some notes about my late grandfather to help process his passing, I was surprised that I hadn't blogged about my trip to Budapest with my grandparents and older brother back in 2007. That was my first year of blogging when I was pretty regular. There's just a gap during those dates. But, it was a great vacation, so I'm glad I spent the time enjoying myself and their company.

Trying out some local goulash, perhaps?

Cow sculptures in  Budapest

Playground-hopping

Monday morning. Woke up assuming Andrei would be around for a few hours this morning, but it turned out that his class schedule rotates, so he had 2 classes as opposed to one this time, and had to be on his way. I got to work on breakfast for me and David. I shared my egg with Sophia even though she's not a year yet and could have a reaction.

We found out yesterday a friend was in town and was free to spend the day with us. Sometimes spontaneous visits are the most successful because there is no time to go back and forth about whether it will work out...we have been trying to get together with so many people with little luck.

As soon as Sophia was asleep I had about an hour to clean and spent 15 minutes in the bathroom, 15 in the living room, and 30 in the kitchen....which still was barely enough to scratch the surface. ;)

Another thing going on was my laptop not functioning...as I mentioned, some of the keys aren't working due to a water spill. Andrei took it with him to drop off at the shop, so David didn't have his show with breakfast. I was actually interested to see how he'd do with less screentime. Andrei's computer was on, but that's not in a central part of the apartment, so not quite as attractive for David to be in there. He did go in from time to time and watch a little.

Anyway, we got through breakfast and then when David wanted to be entertained, I let him play with a pan of uncooked buckwheat (think grains of rice). He was in a pretty calm mood.

Our friend Emily came and we had a little borscht for lunch. We've recently gotten into playing a version of 20 Questions, which is fun. I love that David is old enough for games. He might be ready for board games, too. With the guessing game, we use the first sound of a word, not the letter. That keeps him entertained some at the table, but he was really wandering around the kitchen. With a movie on he can take an hour to eat a few bites, so I wanted to see how he would focus without a movie on. Turns out, not much better! He was eager to show off for company and along with dumping the buckwheat grains on the floor he was excited to show Emily some tricks. She works with preschoolers though, so had her own bag of tricks!

Which Country to Call Home, Part 2

About a month ago, I wrote about our destination as an international family. You can read that post here. After I published it, a friend reminded me about Jesus (in Luke and Matthew) having "no place to lay his head." That is comfort that I have drawn on at times, and it's important to remember that nothing is certain and any of us could find ourselves homeless at any time. For families of mixed citizenship, of course the horrible thought (or reality!) of being separated may rear its head at times. This is something I don't think about too much, even though I can travel to many countries on short notice without a visa, while Andrei cannot. I will have to renew my residency permit soon, including passing an exam! David and Sophia are on visas until we figure out a longer-term solution, and those are never guaranteed either. And who knows what international relations will be like in the future?

So I had sort of written about things from the point of view of human emotions, though my trust is in God. The times of high stress with red tape come in waves, and right now we don't have any major deadlines.

We are in a time of peace. My spirit is at peace and I don't worry about the future. It's partly thanks to my faith and partly the season that we're in. Another season may have me freaking out, but I don't see that as a sign of weakness. I believe that God predisposes us as individuals to be anxious in some situations and stronger in others. I don't see the worry itself as a flaw. It's what we do with it. I'm not afraid of flying, or most travel. But the packing will have me losing sleep every time. Maybe God will take away that feeling of stress someday, or maybe He just uses it to keep me humble. I fully expect to be brought to my knees many more times in this life. When it comes to parenting, Andrei and I sometimes get anxious in contrasting situations. I might be totally calm while he's worrying, and vice versa. But we're both right, and we honor each other's concerns.

I've never liked to speculate. Ever since I was young, I never had any clear ideas about the future. I delayed my college entry decision until the last possible minute, and I declared my major on the last Friday of the last week possible of sophomore year. It was hard when people would ask, because "undecided" wasn't a satisfactory answer. And then people wanted me to make a guess anyway. But I didn't know the future. Then at graduation everyone wanted to know, too. Nope, I never planned to be a missionary. I suppose it is normal to ask these kinds of questions, to show an interest in someone. But....why can't "I don't know?" be an answer? I don't like to say I'm going to do something, if I'm not sure.

Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. -Matt. 5:33-37

Maybe this is why I don't like to talk about it...I don't want to make a promise I can't keep. But the other side of the coin is that I love to make charts and plans and do the research on various leads. So while I might not reveal anything that is uncertain, chances are that I have plenty of ideas brewing, with all of the details mapped up. And I'm happy to share any KNOWN factors with anyone interested. But right now it is on more of a smaller scale; no major life changes at the moment!

Family life

I figured if I went to write a status report then everything would change. Sure enough, I was going to write about how David had been calmer lately, and then he was a bit out of control today. Oh well, I think in general he is getting used to having a younger sibling. In some ways it is just as I pictured: brother and sister doing funny things and entertaining the rest of us. Along with fighting over toys and pinching each other or whatever.

I noticed recently that David was playing by himself more and okay with me doing something else or even being in a different room. It's great if I can get something done without needing to turn on a show for him.

Sonya (Sophia) is army-crawling and even has callouses on her tiny toes from pushing off. She has become very interested in small objects. I have systems for keeping David's toys boxed up and out of the way, but there is always that one thing that gets out...and if there is one small object in the entire room, Sonya will find that one object.

I've felt that kind of bone-tiredness lately where you are kind of going on auto-pilot, totally exhausted. Definitely spacey at times and having a hard time forming complete sentences! Sonya is up a lot at night.  For a while she was waking up halfway through the night, eating, and then playing for like an hour. I often had to call Andrei to come take her and rock her back to sleep. So basically I would start out sleeping with David, then switch rooms and sleep with Sonya, and then go back and forth a few more times. The beds are on opposite sides so I kept getting confused about where the edge was! Basically like the newborn days. Sonya isn't playing as much at night but she still wakes up a lot and whines or moves around. I don't normally look at the clock, but there are a lot of disruptions.

Speaknig (whoops) of sleep, I had this whole plan to cut out computer time in the evening and go to bed earlier. I was going to be well-rested. I think Sonya started the shenanigans around the same time. So after a few days I was going to bed earlier, but behind on various correspondence, missing things like blogging, and still sleep-deprived. So now I don't know.

It will probably all be different a week from now anyway...and then different again the next week.

Middle March

Well, that week flew by! I guess it got taken over by Women's Day, a church function, and registering the kids' passports.

So, the run-down on our daytrip to Finland. It was boring, hooray. I didn't even take any photos except on the train.

We decided to give our beaten up umbrella stroller one last run (we ended up getting another one the next day), figuring we could ditch it and use a soft carrier if it fell apart. It held up, though. Sophia was alert for the train ride as it wasn't yet her usual naptime, but then went to sleep.

Everything went fine with border control. There were a couple funny things about the train such as it not having a baby changing station despite it being the family car. It was way easier having 2 adults, though the train ride was only 2 hours. I think the hardest part was getting on and off and riding the metro to the actual train station.

We went to the same small town in Finland and again I was struck by how quiet it was. Such a relief after being in a big city, like someone had hit the volume button. The weather was just as grey, though. And without big-city sights to provide a little color in the winter, I think it would be a little dull. Definitely pros and cons. I liked immediately noticing ethnic diversity-not that it's absent in Russia, just a different mix. The little stores downtown had so much character, and that's something I miss about living in a small town, buying from local artisans and things like that. If we'd been in a car I probably would have made quite a few purchases! But as it was, our budget went towards train tickets and lunch, and our hands were full from carrying emergency changes of clothing. Oh, and apparently I'm supposed to notify my bank a week before entering a new country, which I had failed to do.

We visited a nice restaurant that I had found on the internet. It felt a little odd being alone there on a Saturday, and I wondered what Finns do on weekends. Were they all out skiing? Home doing chores? Out shopping? But we just relaxed and enjoyed it as Sophia took her nap in the stroller.

We still had about 2 hours and decided to visit the Railway Museum. But once there, we realized we didn't have the motivation to even go inside. David was having great fun running up and down their handicapped ramp and was disappointed that we were leaving. But it was cold outside! So we went to the train station and sat in the waiting area, and David and I went up and down the escalator and elevator and staircase.

On the ride home everyone was a little cranky, of course. But I really felt for a lady sitting near us whose toddler had not napped. She tried the whole way to put him to sleep, and he was only getting drowsy at the end, when it was after 7 pm.

At the next opportunity, Andrei and his father went to the Immigration Office to register David and Sophia at his parents' address.

Now we need to look into getting them permanent residency so that we don't have to always be counting days in and days out. But I think it may be a long process-no fast lane even though they're Russian and I already have permanent residency.

It's getting real

It's an age of many transitions-6 months, that is (almost 7 by the time I post this).

I'd been looking forward to feeding Sophia "people" food, at the very least because she acts so offended when we eat in front of her! Literally, looks at someone taking a bite and starts sobbing. I started mixing up some purees for her, which she tastes sort of nonchalantly. However, now I think "do I HAVE to feed her?" just thinking of all the extra dishes and laundry it creates. I'm looking forward to table foods even more, when we'll just toss some of whatever we're eating on her tray.

Meanwhile, she is getting pretty mobile. She already crawls on her tummy like a pro and is much more determined about getting toys beyond her reach. The floor often seems like the safest place for her now, rather than squirming out of someone's arms. I don't think we bed-shared with David at this age-it's intense! She scratches and kicks, practicing her crawling moves. Time for a guard-rail, stat! Anyway, I think she's going to be a feisty one, so I'm bracing myself. I'm hoping David will be able to help entertain her sometimes. They are already pretty competitive. He commands us to look at him and listen when he is speaking. She hides under a blanket and waits for us to ask "Where's Sophia?"

I was looking back at my blog archives to see when David reached certain milestones, and found this fun post from exactly 4 years ago! Definitely the same things currently going on with Sophia, though she was born a month later, so she might be ahead a tad.

Some differences:

-I don't think of Sophia as fussy or clingy, as I noted with David. Maybe I'm just more relaxed about "getting stuff done"? Of course, David can help sometimes, too.

-Sophia stopped napping too, but I guess earlier on we figured out that she sleeps well in the baby buggy, especially in the winter. We put her in her snowsuit and open the porch window so she's "outside."

The Urban Housewife and Proverbs 31

I was a bit bowled over by a blog post I stumbled upon. The blog itself seems like it has a lot of posts about conservative Christian homemaking that I would normally agree with, and I actually want to read more of her writing. However, the more I live abroad and gain perspective in housekeeping/family life, the more I realize that the suburban American Christian vision of a housewife isn't necessarily a universal ideal.

So with that little intro in mind, here is the situation. Someone wrote to this blogger (linked above) asking for advice on boredom and loneliness as a housewife. The blogger had a fairly-anonymous male reader write a response from a husband's viewpoint.

I guess my first issue is with the women who were supposedly commenting that they were bored. I can't even imagine having "nothing to do!" I can't imagine looking around a house that is already clean and wondering what to do next. Every once in a while I will hear a comment from a woman who took up a new hobby while at home with small children, or while they napped. Sure, I take time for a creative project, but if I waited until I did my "chores," I'd never have time for it. Throughout the post, the man discusses how wives can best use their "free time," and it's like he's writing in a foreign language. That might be just me, though.

I will say that boredom can also probably arise from being busy with something that isn't your favorite. I can definitely feel bored doing various tasks or even playing certain games with my kids. So in that case I agree that sometimes an attitude adjustment is needed.

However, I was a bit shocked by this man's harsh assessment of the "modern" woman:

"Whereas in decades and centuries past where the woman worked hard all day long at doing these types of beneficial household activities and ended up contributing so much more to the overall support of the household, nowadays, especially for the stay at home wife/mom, EVERYTHING is left to the husband to earn and provide for while the wives sit at home idle, suffering with loneliness and complaining that their husbands work too many hours."

We Made It, Part 2

We survived New Year's Eve!

It actually wasn't too bad considering New Year's Eve is one of my least favorite holidays. I think I'm warming up to it, but it's still hard to accept that the Russian New Year is my Christmas. So a lot of the excitement that I feel for Christmas is what they feel before New Year's. Whereas I feel nothing before New Year's, so I feel guilty for feeling nothing! If that even makes sense. I also don't like messing with everybody's sleep schedule and then having to get back on track. That must be an adult thing as I enjoyed plenty of all-nighters in my youth!

So, my in-laws came over around our dinnertime which is 8pm. I barely lifted a finger this time. I try to get the table set and create a generally festive atmosphere, but I can't handle a bunch of cooking and cleaning with small kids around. So they actually brought the food AND the presents, and I was (mostly) cool, calm and collected...MY gift to everyone. Seriously, it was a good plan. I was hanging the laundry while they were there, though...sometimes Andrei and I sneak around trying to get things done while the grandparents are around!

We had a tasty meal: chicken, oven fries (by Andrei), mushrooms in cream sauce, beet salad, and fresh veggies. Assorted storebought desserts.

We tried to get Sophia some sleep before the fireworks began, but she wasn't keen on missing the party. She definitely got a little over-stimulated.

We Made It!

We survived the first semester with 2 kids! Andrei's done administering exams, so we've got a break now until next semester. There are definite perks to the academic schedule. If only certain conditions were a little bit more ideal!

I'm not sure what I pictured exactly, but the last few months could have been worse. We had our non-sleeper first and our good sleeper second (I type this as she is screaming hysterically and not going to sleep, but...usually she's pretty good).

One of the harder things about having more than one child is keeping them safe from each other... keeping them from waking each other up, etc. Sophia is pretty easy-going and can play with her toys by herself when she's in a good mood. So if she were an only child I could get something done, but instead I have to make sure David isn't smothering her. I might have mentioned before that I thought David might be kind of doing it to provoke us. So now that we don't repeat "be gentle" a thousand times a day, he doesn't run right over to squeeze her. He does it spontaneously but it's not like the first thing on his agenda. I have caught him rolling her over a few times, though!

Advent Season (Whoops, Christmas already)

How is your Advent going, if you celebrate? Or maybe you "observe" Advent but save the celebrating for Christmas? Sometimes I wish we celebrated St. Nicholas or St. Lucia, too!

(Then a week went by after I started this post)

I got out the Christmas decorations in November, and I was glad for that because my enthusiasm soon fizzled out. In order to enjoy them in December, they really need to be put up in November, right? Before things get crazy?

David is almost 4.5 and I keep waiting for the year when he will be "into" Christmas. We got out our Christmas books and dutifully read them every night for a few weeks, but I don't even suggest it anymore. David likes to decline suggestions now with "I don't think so" or "no thank you." And this includes a lot of my arts and crafts or cooking ideas. He's said "I don't think so" to several baking projects recently. I tried making cookies but the dough was too sticky and David plopped a few M&Ms on and called it a day. I gave him free reign over all the ornaments but he didn't even have the heart to hang any. He likes the part where he opens the boxes and discovers the contents (but not putting them back). Maybe I could make that count for something, sometime. Are boys just not into the baking and decorating?

And he doesn't like listening to music.

So...this is the adult side of Christmas (or any holiday), I guess. Doing things that it seems no one appreciates, so that they can look back on it later as a nice memory. I'm not being sarcastic...I'm sure as a child I did my share of complaining and taking everything for granted. And now I miss those days. Of course David is gradually learning bits and pieces of how Jesus came to Earth and walked among us. So it's not like the holiday is ignored.

As usual, I stopped short of getting ALL the decorations out...funny, I remember my own mother doing that. I thought to myself...I'll make myself get them out, and then I'll have to do the work again when I put them away. So there is just a little bit here and there. I love the lights, though. I want to get more of those. Pretty lighting definitely adds a special mood. I lost my Christmas greeting cards that I put up every year. :( I hope they turn up someday. Yes, I hang onto every little scrap of paper from my life.

My MIL is in the hospital! And probably won't be released by Christmas. :( But hopefully for New Year's. Also, Andrei is preaching on Saturday and Sunday at a church retreat, which we're not going to. So that's our Christmas! But I think the "elves" may come up with a bit of holiday magic after all...

A year of this

Still need to finish typing up Sonya (Sophia)'s birth story. It is bittersweet in a way because I didn't know until recently how injured I was. But she is a delightful baby and I think the birth experience was gentle for her, if that's a thing.

The birth story isn't scary, I promise. :)

But as for daily life, I am feeling very thankful to be allowed to be at home. I don't really have a way to even get out by myself with the kids, but I look forward to doing that as I get stronger. While I have my MIL helping (hopefully for years to come!) and David doesn't need to be in school, I am really looking at it as a time to heal. It is a very important time in terms of being more functional in the future.

This morning I convinced David to snuggle with me in bed a little longer, as Sonya can sleep until 10 or 11. A text from Andrei told me it was snowing outside. I hadn't even looked! Then a friend came over and took David out to play, and Sonya went down for a nap, so I had a quiet house for a bit. I made an orange peel and cinnamon infusion on the stovetop and it was so relaxing. We had lunch, the friend went home, and David went down for a nap without a huge struggle.

Andrei came home and we chatted for a bit before David woke up. Then thanks to David having had less screen time earlier in the day, I felt no guilt putting on Netflix while cleaning the kitchen before small group. Then Nina came over to help before friends came for Bible study. David was so excited to play with her!

It was good to see church family since it had been 5 months. I was still very symptomatic today but got to see people and have a connection with the outside world. Survived another day!

Sophia's birth story, Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

While I'm facing the reality of a post-partum body and having a newborn all over again, it seems like a good time to review the miracle of Sophia's birth!

(for anyone just tuning in, we live in St. Petersburg, Russia, but I traveled both times to the U.S. to give birth...)

There were a few things about David's birth experience that we changed right away, or at least hoped to do differently. For one thing, I switched from the local Ob-Gyn in my hometown to a midwifery practice in a neighboring town. Longer commute, but a very caring community for the most part. Different birth plan, too-but I'll get to that later.

As my pregnancy progressed, I was often measuring ahead of schedule, and wondered if this baby might be early. I also had gestational diabetes, though. Once I got on a diet, my weight gain slowed down and things seemed more normal. But I still wondered if I might go early.

Once I got towards my due date, though, I had zero symptoms of labor. Same as with David! I mean, not a hint. I barely even felt pregnant. I was carrying really low though (low tone in abdominal muscles), and was told repeatedly that baby had "dropped" and that I looked "ready." Actually, I started getting those comments about 2 months before she was born.

The new typical Tuesday (AKA taking turns napping)

Andrei had one of his heavier teaching days today and also had to get up earlier. As he was about to leave, David woke up, and I had just spent the past 90 minutes or so settling Sophia, in anticipation of more sleep. Andrei set up David with a movie and set off for work. David loves TV time as much as any kid his age, but doesn't necessarily like it as a solo activity. For now he found an imaginary playmate and made some commentary periodically. But I can't say I got more sleep. A "survive until naptime" kind of day!

The next goal was to eat breakfast and look presentable before Babushka Nina (Andrei's mom) arrived. 2 hours goes by faster than you'd think! As I made myself some breakfast, I kept stopping to give David various menu items to keep him placated. So I only ate part 1 of my breakfast and then took David with me around to different rooms making beds and putting together an outfit. Of course every once in a while I would feed, burp or change Sophia, or put her back to sleep. She can still sleep a lot, though seems to be sensitive to noise.

David kept suggesting games which we didn't have time for, particularly something called "making a robot" which sounded pretty involved. We did finally read some books while I was nursing Sophia. A current favorite is a book about the Human Body, and skeletons were a big theme this summer.

Despite all that running around I only got half (of two) beds made, and was nursing Sophia when Nina arrived, so couldn't open the door for her. I had planned to quickly (haha) get everyone out the door for some fresh air before it got close to lunch/nap(cranky) time. However, David did NOT want to go outside. He wanted to see what Nina had in her purse for him, and there was a glow-in-the-dark dinosaur to play with. Then I changed the plan and decided it was too close to naptime to attempt a trip to the playground. "I want to go OUTSIDE" said David.

Sophia had just eaten, so took a nap while we had a little lunch (plus the other half of my breakfast) and tea with banana muffins. Then she was waking up and it was time to put David down for a nap. The way for me to get sleep to would be to lie down with David while Nina took care of the baby, since Sophia isn't always a quiet sleeper. However, I had to wait for Sophia to wake up first, so I had Nina start the process of putting David down for a nap.

After Sophia was all fed, I checked on David and he wasn't nearly asleep. He was very upset when I switched off with Nina even though I promised she would be there when he woke up. I just couldn't wait any longer to take a nap. Despite the neighbors hammering above us, he managed to fall asleep after about an hour, while I lay there wondering when the baby would be hungry again! I woke up at every creak and thump, but must have slept since I had some very interesting dreams.

When David and I woke up, we heard Andrei's voice! I had expected him a few hours later but it turns out his evening class was actually in the morning now and he'd told me already (no memory of that). So we had a nice surprise with him home earlier.

We were all settled in the kitchen having tea and snacks and I looked wistfully at the late afternoon sun and said we should probably just stay inside since everyone was content. "I want to go OUTSIDE!" said David. Andrei went to lie down and and Nina and I worked quickly to get David into some clothes before he changed his mind (coat/sweater/shirt/gloves layered just the right way). "I want to stay INSIDE!" said David. And sneezed 5 times in a row on both of us. But I quickly ushered them out the door and sat down at my computer!

Next time maybe I will leave everyone else at home and go outside for my own walk.