I don't know if there is any way to kind of "speed up" the processing that you go through after traumatic (major or minor) events. If we could control it, I suppose we would choose to fall apart only when convenient. I know as a parent especially, I try to "hold it together" until another adult comes and I can go cry. But again, it isn't that easy to control.
So this month there have been a lot of various stressful events-terrorist attacks, church conflict, holiday tension....and I felt totally calm. Well, on the day of the bombing, I wanted to cry, but didn't want the kids to get upset...yet by evening, the feelings were gone.
Then with church stuff, I honestly felt at peace. But when I was physically at the church meeting, it all started coming back...just like I had to go through certain emotions when entering the metro after the terrorist attack. I had to be in the sanctuary and see the empty seats to really feel the loss.
We've got colds in our house now...we had some church friends over for fellowship last Friday, and Sophia started projectile vomiting! Heh, sorry for the visual.
I was thinking back to last year when there was also church stuff going on, and people prayed for our family, and then David broke his collarbone! Which is not to say that it was a direct correlation. BUT for Andrei to be able to stay focused in his ministry, he really needs his family life to be peaceful. Everyone being sick and cranky probably doesn't help, but there is also a lot of cooperation going on, and it could be a lot worse. Like I said, there is a lot going on...but I'd better hit publish.
Oh, I hope things settle down for you - it's so hard with lots of stressful events, and having a terror attack close by would be scary! Praying that things are peaceful at church AND with family life.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about the inability to control the stress..... I have a post in the back of my mind about this sort of thing. Sometimes you think you have it together and you realize that you absolutely do not. At least you are driving! A friend once warned me, after my brother died, that I should take special care while driving, because despite THINKING I was "OK", the emotional stuff was taking a toll on my ability to function at full capacity. I did keep that in mind, so I wasn't as surprised as I would otherwise have been when I was driving and went through a red flashing light because I momentarily thought it meant the same thing as a green flashing light. I pulled over in shock and remembered the warning....
ReplyDeleteOn a larger scale, I think that children who have undergone stress (even the positive stress of adoption) put all their energies into coping with THAT and therefore aren't progressing in other ways. so they can seem immature and young, which causes other issues.
Anyway....take care! (Also, I HATE that "waiting to cry" and then when the opportunity comes, not really being able to.....)
Intended to say - At least you aren't driving".
DeleteI wonder how people drive with children in the car! I think that motherhood in general eliminates us from doing a lot of tasks safely. Sleep deprivation, mood swings, losing our patience...
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