Friday, May 2, 2014

Bye bye, blog posts


Sometimes I wish I typed on a typewriter, so I could pick up those failed compositions and physically tear them up before tossing into the trashcan recycle bin.

Writing is something I need to do to feel calm. But it takes time. I remember lots of all-nighters, beginning in high school. I would write and write and then edit until it was perfect. Soooo satisfying! And I love doing it on my blog, too. Even informal writing can be tweaked and tweaked until it's exactly what you were going for.

But it's midnight...sigh. I hate when I can't finish the posts. I do try to get all the main thoughts down as quickly as I can, so I can finish it later. But I can't help but feel that my heart is more likely to be engaged in that initial attempt. When I finish it later, it's already a different post...my first thoughts are lost. And sometimes I feel a real sort of grief, because I've lost my first reactions to something I witnessed that day; a funny story; a memory; an epiphany. It's gone and it hurts. Andrei told me that if it's something God really wanted me to hold onto, that He would remind me.

As far as organization, I like some of Callie's strategies that she describes here, and those work for me too, sometimes. But other times I am going through those archives of ideas I've saved for later, and they just don't resonate the way I thought they would. I think partly I feel more vulnerable these days about sharing my personal thoughts.

Meanwhile, I have to pack for the weekend! I already made an initial clothing pile, but it's suddenly winter again...time to add a few more layers back to the wardrobe! Not sure the laundry is even going to be dry in time...oops!

Have a nice weekend, everybody!

2 comments:

  1. You described EXACTLY how I feel! You put so much of my frustration into words. There was some point when I really felt much more able to blog (maybe pre-Monnie?) Now, I have SO MUCH to write about (and the NEED to write, which you expressed so well), but no time. I get something started and that's about it. The last post I wrote transformed itself entirely....and then no one commented. When no one comments it feels like such a wasted effort. Especially when you think they read it - and must either disagree entirely or think your thoughts are lame. Ah, well!

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  2. I keep missing your updates because it doesn't show up in my sidebar anymore.

    I think I am going to fiddle around with my schedule about and see if I find more time for writing. To be honest, I can always write in my prayer journal for a few minutes before bed. But I guess I feel like I want to share some of these thoughts with the world! It seems hard these days to have blog discussions...there is just so much out there on the Internet, and such a drive to get page hits, that it's hard for good old-fashioned bloggers to find each other.

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