Sunday, November 15, 2009

On your side

In the midst of conflict, there is often a temptation to run to someone who will take our side. And why not? There's nothing inherently wrong with the desire to be understood. This is the way we have been created.

The problem is that we don't always represent the whole story. Maybe we don't consciously think about escaping blame, but in crafting our story, we leave out certain bits of information and neglect others. We pick up the phone or sit down at the computer to "pour our heart out" to someone who doesn't really know the whole situation.

This is a bad idea on two counts: 1) Sharing about a situation can quickly turn to gossip. 2) We are not confronting the source of the problem. continue/-

As a missionary, of course, there is the temptation to run to one's home culture and seek sympathy there. But our lines shouldn't be drawn in such a way. The "us" should refer to the Church, not to culture.

Sometimes I realize that if I open my mouth, I won't be able to explain the situation without casting blame on someone else. Human pride is a strong force! And so, the only person left to run to is the One who created me.

When you were little, didn't you run to Mommy or Daddy in difficult situations, completely trusting that you would be comforted? I believe that God waits to comfort us in the same way. He is on our side.

"As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you; and you will be comforted over Jerusalem." Is. 66: 13


  1. Эх, сложно это всё. Согласен, обсуждение ситуации легко может стать сплетней и, скорее всего, никогда не будет полностью объективным. Однако молчать о каких-то вещах, тоже не выход. Проблемы ведь от этого не исчезнут.
    Возможно, беседы и нужны, чтобы понять степень своей предвзятости.

  2. Согласна. Продолжение следует...

  3. I have a great burden at the moment..and this post speaks very much to it. The only people who know all the details are more on "my side"...and the very fact that they have seen more and heard more sort-of makes them my allies naturally; it doesn't seem fair. Yet, no one who does NOT know all the ins and outs could possible be just in an opinion. Seems impossible to sort out - and I came to the very sae conclusion. Prayer is IT.

  4. Exactly. And sometimes there is no decision left to make; you just want someone to tell you you're right, and/or another person is wrong. Even if it's after the fact. And what is a pure motive in this case? I really have to test my heart about that one.


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